Gettin on my nerves!!

@11.25am 29 November 2006

i hate the fact that i can do nothing when things are going out of way!!!!!!

why are there pple who doesnt care about pple's feeling?!
why is it that it must be a someone who is blood related to me....
i wished i can make him disappear from this world.

i don't like staying home....i want peace....i don't like to hear my family squabble over all kinds of matter.
no matter how hard i try to inject the bits of senses, doesnt seemed to help the situation. i cannot do anything....nothing!!!

these days either im home late or i'll slp over at darling's place.
im avoidin....runnin away from the existin problems.
since can't help just stay away....
im easily affected....very emotional being..
when my friends meet up with any r/s problems etc...i'll put myself in their shoes n start to think a lot....
was pretty bad in the past, but i think im doing good right now.

skipped work today AGAIN...slpt @3am...no idea why but i jus cldn't slp.
smses kept comin in this mornin...
one of my sec sch frens whom i was once closed with smsed me to ask how have i been.
was a pleasant surprise in the mornin...i missed those days hanging out with her n many others...

another sec sch mate msged me in friendster...
be meetin her soon for dinner n chill! got lots to catch up on...
my yan sweetie make sure get ready those photos that she owed me forever........*lol

no idea what Nana is gonna do at home today....im still tired...slpy...
parents woke me up early for breakfast when in fact i missed work bcos i was too tired...its always the case...papa will give me a fright each mornin by knockin hard on my door....mummy will call my mobile instead of knockin on my door...my parents are weird....*lol...
they really can make me laugh n cry....

i hope i can go out today n not stay home....
i missed bestie....i wana meet up soon to talk....
Smsed to scold him last nite....always kana tortured by Nana....but he'll understand...

Picts to share....

(28 November 2006)
@Science Centre:

--this is one of the coral types, named Symphyllia. Look like human brain, isnt it?


--puffer fish lookalike, its not...can't rem what its called! but its SUPER cute!!


--colourful marine tank...i like!


--this is a Stonefish..super stone la! ha..


--horrible looking marine creature..the "Marine Eel"..


--Owena, the little kid..very chubby...cute!


--oh yes...i took a pict of this baby...so CUTE!! i love this baby!!

childhood memory...

@01.15am 29 November 2006

I skipped work today bcos i had to accompany my bestie..

some things happened...it was like a week ago & i only knew just today.
well..get wad i mean...im not there when my fren feels like shit.
she diden wana contact me bcos she'll waterfall in front of me.
seriously, i dun mind the least bit of being there for my friends who are going through torment.
"what are friends for"...does this phrase ring a bell?! we used it so often during the good old days. but as we grow older, the distance btwn will eventually be slightly bigger than before. anyhow, im glad i can be there for her.

acting brave in front of me...i would rather u cry my dear.
but frankly, i wan u to be brave this time...
if u r reading dis...
we're still young, the road ahead is long....so move forward! i'll always be ard when u need me.

anyway, let me update abit abt wad exactly we did today.

actually i was already at my workplace when the call came in...
i diden hesitate & agreed to meet up...cos i put friendship above everything.
i wonder if my friends put me in their priority list..
whatever the case..im more than willing to be there 24-7.

headed over to her place..had breakfast nearby...
thats not all...the day have jus begun...

headed down to tamp to pick her girl whom she's giving tuition to now...
her name is Owena, pri 2 this yr. quiet.
bcos she did well for the exams, bestie promised to bring her to Science Centre.
the last time that i've been to the Science Centre was like when i was Pri 3 or 4..
donkey yrs...memory faded...recalled bits of here n there.
but i was excited to go...like Owena..
it was not too bad a visit, unfortunately, many exhibits were under repair or brokedown. it was so tiring to walk all about...esp when im in formal & heels..

my ankle hurts...my heels gave me problems...
but i still tahan all the way till just not long ago i came home.

the kid diden wana go home after the Science Centre visit.
we took a bus down to paya lebar, brought her to have dinner..
n she still doesnt wana go home.
bestie's buddy came to meet us, we decided then to go bowling @katong.
another thing which i haven done for ages.
always wanted to bowl but jus don't have the time or chance to do so.
was fun....*smiles..
somehow all these activities preoccupied bestie's mind.
keep her from overly workin her brain.

eventually back home will still think...but it will be over in no time.
cheer up girl!!

im seriously drained out! contemplating to go work tmr anot.
die die have to work on thurs & fri cos the company needs me. so maybe Nana shld give herself a rest day tmr?!
i'll try my best to wake up on time..TRY....*fingers crossed..

chattin w the kid now...she's at bestie's place..slp over tonite..
feelin bit peckish....no food no supper...
hate slpin w hunger.....haven done so for a long long time....

not useless...but helpless

been thinkin a lot....

many things happened for a reason...
but reality bites.....so why even take the extra effort to think?!

im fortunate....i've got a handful of close frens...
n many other friends whom i can rely on....
but lately, i realised im not doing my part as a friend.
when my friend needed me, im not there.....
when she had to seek help from strangers...im not there...
i don't like the feeling of havin another person to tell me all these about a friend of mine whom i care a lot...
the distance grew apart in our hearts...though physically close..
i missed those days...
i hope she'll be happy with whatever she does...

i never have the day to tell her what i know...cos i dun wish to rack up the unhappy past.....
jus rem my friends....i loved all of u.....
even if we quarrelled or fought in the past....its over....
u friends are always in my heart...my phonebook...my mind....

im burnin inside...

im extremely heaty......

missed work today....all bcos of those nightmares that i had...
eye was kinda swollen when i woke up, Nana prolly have cried in one of those nightmares...but somehow i jus cun recall any of it...

im stayin home not goin anywhere cos i need ample rest.
had brunch with my parents.......
the food suxs...
the coffeeshop might looked well renovated, but doesnt guarantee good food!!

had ice-cream right after brunch...
i tink im crazy...i dun really tk ice-cream cos i normally vomit after eatin.
that suxs too....
surprisingly, Nana diden vomit!! showin improvement...

met up with bestie to tk train home together...
he got Nana the Q10 cream at less than half the original price...good buy!!
my bestie is always my superman!! smiles...

been chattin on msn for the whole aftern.....
everyone's workin while their on msn....Nana the only one at home.
stayin at hm makes me feel lerthagic & even more tired....

meetin up with karin & andy for dinner n maybe movie...
headin out soon....

i missed my baby darling.....
ha...but i'll be seein him tmr....his POP!!!
n yes...i have to say...i missed shuling sweetheart..
otherwise she will complaint that i missed my darling only...hehe...
be meetin up with sweetheart on thurs after work....
cun wait....tk pics!!! yippe!!!

here's a pic of Nana & darling...
my darling's face super slim mode....Nana seemed bigger!!

100% Drained out!!

Since sat i haven been slpin enough....

somehow im a light sleeper now...im easily waken up by noises...
especially early in the mornin...i get really pissed with all the plates knockin..
hairdryer, TV etc.....
Arghhh.....
its not anyone's fault...jus dat im "yim jim"....haha....

seriously, im dead beat now......
but i'll endure....for the sake of hearin my darling's voice....still waitin for his call...

work have been so relaxed that i can easily jus dozed off...
either im packed with work that simply does not require any brain processin...
or....i can kill mosquitoes...loll...

oh no...i forgot my 10pm drama showing now...
gotta run......
gotta slp early today!!!!

how long have i not blog??

well...almost 2 wks that i've not blog...

been comin home late almost everyday for the past weeks.
not idea why...but somehow just diden wana stay home...
when im alone in the room, i'll start thinkin.....
sad thoughts start sinkin in....n thats when depression haunts..

i've been living my life to the fullest for the past week...
had a new haircut....felt freshen up!
met up with many friends for shoppin, chillin....etc...

its been a hard time waitin for my piggy darling to come home...
and yes...finally....he's BACK!!!!
surprisingly, he got me many stuff. piggy is never into shoppin...
im touched cos he did it just bcos its for his "Precious Nana"!!! *smiless.....

darling loves Nana new haircut....cute...look so much younger..haha...
somehow i wasnt really used to the new Me....
but slowly im immuned la....
afterall many of my friends complimented on my haircut...

right...work so far so good....
Nana overslpt today, missed work.......shit!!!
dis week i worked 2 days only.......the company is gonna gimme eat cuttlefish man!!! hahaha.....

be meetin poly frens for dinner in town in the evenin....
i hope my dear friend would like the dress that we got her....
cos its cute!!! i personally liked the dress a lot!!
this time round very involved in the plannin of gift..
got the cake myself...present also must personally go find...
luckily i had Andy gemeng to help.....
ya n my shoppin queen Tracy.......

shall tk a nap before headin out....
cun wait to see my piggy tmr....
loved him to bits....Muackz!!!